Last Updated On: October 2019
Just the other week, I messed up bad. It is one of those things that I would go back in time to fix if I could. Of course, time travel is not a thing (yet), so that is not really an option. The next best thing I can do though is help you not make the same mistake, even though it is painful every time I retell this story but here we go.
Buckle up and find out how to not get ripped off when buying Whizzinator products, better known as "the fake penis". Truth be told, it's not even the best solution for you.
My story begins with a big night out, followed by the news on Monday morning that urine tests were scheduled for later in the week at work. You can imagine that I was beginning to freak out.
I did my research through Google typing in and decided to find a Whizzinator for sale as a solution to all of my problems. I ordered straight away, but little did I know that the site I used was not the official website. It had a good sale price, that was one of the main reasons I bought it. I read on forums that I should buy the Whizzinator because it was one of the most popular devices on the market, but I was more worried about it passing my urine drug test so I skipped the rest of my research and just went for it.
I waited anxiously during Tuesday and then Wednesday, until finally, my device arrived in the mail. The minute I took it out of the packaging though, I knew something was wrong. In preparation for receiving the kit I had been watching the video tutorials, and I could see that the product I had in my hand was not the same as the one in the official video.
I called their customer service line, and my worst fears were confirmed. They were very quickly able to tell me that what I had was a fake!
Even though their customer service guy went above and beyond by giving me tips on how to get the best out of the inferior kit (even though it was a knockoff of their product). I knew I was in trouble and even though I ordered the real deal on the spot, I knew deep down it would not arrive in time.
On the morning of the test, I did the best I could with the fake kit, but I could tell that the warming system just was not effective, and the tubing was not at all well designed for natural flow.
I didn’t just fail the test though – I was outright caught trying to cheat it. Because the product did not work correctly, my strange behavior was picked up by the tester, and I was busted. The real kicker was that I ended up covered in the fake urine in the process.
I have never been so embarrassed and upset with myself in my whole life. Needless to say, my boss was not impressed, and I had to go find myself a new job and explain to my fiancé the reason why.
You may think I am the last person that should be giving advice given how badly I messed up, but I like to think that my experience has taught me a lot about these devices.
The worst part of this story is I did not just mess up once, but twice. I bought the real Whizzinator and failed another test with that. The synthetic urine was just too cold for the lab test and it raised a red flag.
After that failure, I did my research, joining a number of Facebook groups and they all recommended The Monkey Dong to me. It was reliable, cheaper, and has a way better brand of synthetic urine. I passed my first time using the product. And luckily for you, we've reviewed it right here. Moving on...
Due to the type of job I have, I knew I had many more tests ahead of me. I needed to find one product that was reliable and affordable so discovering The Monkey Dong was like an answered prayer.
I have no hesitations saying that The Monkey Dong is the best on the market and probably deserves more hype than it gets. Let me talk you through why I have such a strong opinion about this.
First of all, I would like to talk about the build quality of the kit. It's an affordable product which attracts a lot of first-time buyers. When you open the package, you can see and feel the quality right away.
I have closely inspected every part of the Monkey Dong, and it really is made from top quality, medical grade components. And I have to say, I have never felt more secured in my life than I do now.
So, how much does this contraption actually cost? For starters, you can get different colors of the product to match your skin tone and they are all priced at $139.95. Pretty steep, right?
So, there you have it, if you are looking to buy a Whizzinator to get you through your next supervised drug test then you might be looking at the wrong thing because this can really put a dent on your savings account. A better alternative would be the Monkey Dong or Monkey Whizz products because after putting it through a bunch of tests, it actually fairs way better and costs a lot less than the product that we're reviewing here.
Just like any other product out there, there is a big advantage buying from the official sellers. When buying something as important as a urination device, there is no point trying to be tricky and finding some other cheap retailer website or local stores near you that has knocked off a dollar or two to tempt you in.
Also, we just want to note that you won't be able to buy these products from third-party sellers like Amazon, Ebay, Craigslist, and other online stores.
Buying directly from official sellers/retailers will ensure you get the right product delivered and in your hand right when you need it. Overall, even though I had one of the worst experiences of my life, I can say I learnt a valuable lesson.
OK, to summarize all of this information, we would definitely lean heavily towards The Monkey Dong over this one.
Even when I bought the official Whizzinator, it failed and it cost me a lot.
I have been using the Monkey Dong for the last two years, and I would not switch to a different product even if I was paid.
You can purchase the real Monkey Dong by clicking the button below where it will take you to an approved reseller.
About the Author Anna Miller
Anna is a content writer, blogger, and entrepreneur. When she is not spending time managing and supervising her business, Lindsley's Lumber, Anna creates content for her synthetic urine website. Aside from being an entrepreneur and blogger, she is also a pet lover, loves to cook and maintain her home garden. You can find out more about me here.