Normally I wouldn’t think catching a buzz at a party was a big deal at all, except that after one particularly debauched weekend I found out that I had to take a piss test for work. This had me stressed out beyond belief, and I definitely didn’t want my private life to interfere with my work life.
I did what any other internet-savvy millenial would do in that situation; I turned to the internet to go over my options and figure out the best way to pass the quickly-approaching piss test.
Every site I checked gave me three main choices:
Once I decided to use synthetic urine to pass the test, I was terrified that I was going to get caught. Being the studious stoner/researcher/dude with a blog that I am, I bought a few brands of fake piss to test at home with a take-home drug test.
I wanted to see which brands were easiest to prepare, I wanted to know I would test clean, and I wanted to know that the product would be easy to use under pressure. Ultra Klean and Quick Fix was the most talked about on forums so i decided to check them out.
Ultra Klean synthetic urine has been around for about twenty years, and they have a patent on their formula, so they keep the ingredients pretty hush-hush.
What we do know is that Ultra Pure urine has a three-year shelf life, and can be used by both sexes.
It contains creatinine so that your piss matches up chemically with natural urine- they also test each batch to make sure that the pH and specific gravity are on point. Ultra Pure also contains uric acid, which is a big selling point for them, but may actually be behind testing technology (more on that later).
When you buy the test it comes with the bottle of Ultra Pure, a hand warmer, a rubber band, flip top cap, and complete instructions for use.
The big question is "does Ultra Pure synthetic urine work?". Even though Ultra Pure Synthetic Urine has been around since 1997, and is still in business, it gets mixed reviews from its users, which is a big red flag for me!
It’s not very expensive, coming in at $24.99 for a 2 oz bottle, so if you want to try it for yourself you won’t be too deep in the hole, but I’d rather pay a bit more to go for the market leading brand with consistently good reviews (Quick Fix Plus).
On top of that, a lot of the other brands claim that uric acid and urea are the same thing, and that a sample containing either will ensure that you pass the test. These days, labs are testing for urea specifically, so while Ultra Pure contains uric acid, you should go for Quick Fix which contains urea.
If you go with Ultra Pure, you just won’t have the same peace of mind as you would if you knew that the fake piss you bought contained the real shit that labs are actually looking for.